In this episode, I discuss the smell of desperation. Most people can smell it on you. You never want to make a decision in a position of desperation; it always ends in disaster.
I personally have made decisions based on fear and or desperation. The worst part about this is that everyone else can see it and smell it on you, even if you think you’re disguising it. It’s one of the easiest things to detect about another person in business, and you never want to be the one person in the room coming across as desperate.
Desperation really affects any encounter. I think the same thing applies to relationships; if you go into a situation looking to connect with someone and you’re coming across as desperate, you will most likely turn off everyone you are trying to attract. Nobody wants to deal with a desperate person. Just like this holds true for relationships, it also holds true in business.
For example, let’s say that you are looking for someone to partner with in real estate. Let’s say you are looking for a private investor. If you approach every potential private investor in a very desperate, overly aggressive way, I can guarantee you they are not going to lend you their money. They will most likely not even want to talk to you more than they have to. I have been approached by people in business who were extremely desperate. Unfortunately, I have also been the person in business who is coming across as desperate to other people. I wasn’t necessarily desperate, but I was just too enthusiastic and probably a little bit too pushy. It was simply enthusiasm, but it seemed desperate and a little aggressive. The key is not to hide your desperation, but to not feel desperate.
Like I said, desperation is not good in your personal life either. In my case, when I stopped trying so hard to find someone to date, it became much easier to attract the right person. I had been dating for a little while but never could seem to find the right person. I really wanted to find someone that I could connect with and enjoy being with, but it wasn’t happening. It didn’t happen until I sort of gave up and just decided stop trying and see what happens. Almost immediately, I met my wife and the rest is history. Almost the identical thing happened to my wife. When she stopped worrying so much about finding someone, we just sort of found each other. It wasn’t a big effort and neither of us was trying very hard in the beginning.
Business can be like that as well. Try to do your own thing. Try to make this business work without relying on private investor or a partner. When things start going well and you are clearly showing the world that you are an action-taker, I know that doors will start opening and people will be attracted to you in business.
Desperation stinks, and no one wants to smell it on you. Don’t be desperate. Be confident, take massive action, and the rest will fall into place. Take my word for it.